im not your PERFECT daughter. im sorry mom !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

arghhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!! why?????
you know how heavy is my burden?????
you know i really hate it
i hate it like i hate the hellll
i know im not a perfect person
why i get angry so easily then you all say " you say you are a christian.." and bla bla bla. SHUT THE F*CK UP MOM and my DEAREST AUNTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
who says chirstians cant get angry?
who says christians are perfect??
you say you understand me
i was just got angry at my dad
because it was just a small thing and he said im stupid
do you know i REALLY REAlly REALLY HATE it when you call me stupid??
i have my own MY SWEET MOMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
sometimes i really cant understand why my dad treats me like this?
work pressures?
like i dont have school presure tooo??????????
do you know teenagers nowadays love thier own ways???
it is called BEING INDEPENDENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i really hate this
i almost wanted to end up my life
i have many pressure
school, relationship, and PARENTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
dad you know, the way you talk to me is like you hate me
if you hate me then why you gave birth to me
if you hate me then why you bought everything to me
sometimes i really cant understand why
dont you think REBELLING is such a POPULAR stuff in the teenagers' life nowadays???
today my aunt is gonna share the same room with me
and guess what?
she just said that she has already understood me
she said i just couldnt do well
WT*????
how the hell you knew??????
SO, i think im gonna give up
and IM NOT GONNA SHARE MY ROOM WITH YOU
I WONT ASK YOU TO GET OFF FROM MY BEDROOM
AS I KNOW, I GIVE A F*CKING RESPECT TO YOU
SO, I'LL SLEEP IN THE COUCH DOWN STAIRS THERE
GOOD NIGHT SLEEP DREAMS !!!!!!!!!!!!

1.05.10 *wish i could reverse the time so everything would be perfect*

today, something happened
i got his message wrote :[ ♥ ...
i asked what happened
he said that i didnt know what happened
and he said i left him for someone else.
*oh he thought i was serious with john* lol

but then he was asking me wanna get back to him
like i always say "once i turn around im not coming back"
i dont know how to do man!

he asked me if i still love him and i said i think so
he gave me the same answer when i asked him sooo...
should i get back to him?
or just leave him alone?

i wish i could leave him alone
but you know its easy to say hard to do

and oh im trying dont really care about it
i know i have got to make a decision
but just.. sigh its complicated

oh well i really dont know what to do
just wait
i need time :)